here you go, can i join your spider drawing club? (A)
with love
M
Sunday 30 November 2008
Friday 28 November 2008
28.11.08
hey hey hey
well its the younger siblings birthday today.... joyeous, shes just turned 12, i reamember my 12th birthday, it was insane, because my dadd owns a music venue and this DJ guy owed him a favour, i had a proper full out disco thing for my 12th there was about 50 people there and i had an amazing night, it was soooo mcuh fun XD
but she got a mobile phone, ooo funsies :L shes been waiting to get one since, well i got one really....
but yeah, imma off school today because im on study leave, only got one more exam to go and then im free until next may... i think i failed a couple... ok maths but yeah :L
i'm currently at my dads house, totally stressing about christmas, i've writen my dad a song and i was going to record it and give it to him on cd, but my stepmum says that i should perform it on christmas and now im stressing laaks..
oh happy st.andrews day btw :)
tis all for now
much love
xxxxxxx
well its the younger siblings birthday today.... joyeous, shes just turned 12, i reamember my 12th birthday, it was insane, because my dadd owns a music venue and this DJ guy owed him a favour, i had a proper full out disco thing for my 12th there was about 50 people there and i had an amazing night, it was soooo mcuh fun XD
but she got a mobile phone, ooo funsies :L shes been waiting to get one since, well i got one really....
but yeah, imma off school today because im on study leave, only got one more exam to go and then im free until next may... i think i failed a couple... ok maths but yeah :L
i'm currently at my dads house, totally stressing about christmas, i've writen my dad a song and i was going to record it and give it to him on cd, but my stepmum says that i should perform it on christmas and now im stressing laaks..
oh happy st.andrews day btw :)
tis all for now
much love
xxxxxxx
Monday 24 November 2008
sorry... :S
Heya Sorry i havent posted in a while (well on my standards, i have been checking blogger just havent had the energy to actually sit and type something out...ach wells) So yeah, im currently half way through my forth year prelims which i have to say is awesome! - not. it actually sucks, it means im at school at really random times and i don't get to see my friends, plus we just had inservice days and i went to visit my Dad which was good fun, and that leads to inevitably talking about the gig i went to on Friday (which was amzing btw) and talking about the little (ok minor understatment) argument i had with T at it. Ok the band are Twin Atlantic from glasgow and they are really really good, and such lovely guys as well, i ended up spending most of the afternoon on friday talking to them and watching them sound check.. but yeah check 'em out -
But yeah at the gig... Well i was working the door because it was the only way my dad was going to let me off the hook for not working in the resturant.... meh and then T and that arrive and i was all sweet, but then i saw T and it was pretty obvious she was pissed, which annoyed me a bit but i was like whatever, yeah and then this guy i know called J and he was really really drunk, Twin are his favourite band and everything but then the bouncer scottie chucked him out and T went with him, i had a bit of an argument with her, telling her not to go and then she left with him in a taxi while i was talking to a different friend of mine, so yeah shes left with this guy, who is very drunk and has a rep of being a slag, shes 14 and that so me, im worried t'hell what if something happens what if she regrets it etc etc so i try and phone her a couple of times and she doesnt answer, not the best sign so yeah i'm pissed off then i get a text on saturday NIGHT asking if i can apologise to my dad for her, and stuff and its like EXCUSE ME! WHAT ABOUT ME BITCH EVER THOUGHT I COULD HAVE BEEN UPSET ABOUT THIS! so yeah she obviously didnt take my thoughts into concideration and then she text me sayin sorry and shit and i was just like, you need to learn to take the consquences for what youve done and i wont believe your sorry until i know you really mean it, i got back a reply that had my text copied out and then a hyphen and i dont believe it, lol im at J house watching Kung Fu Panda... ok who actually does that, they totally disregard someones feeling and go on to talk about what fucking movie they are watching with the guy that they left the night before with... hmm so not a happy millie, Then last night i get a phonecall, it T shes in tears, she cant believe what she did, shes so stupid she shouldve have done it, blah blah blah blah blah tbh because yeah i think she thinks she means it but its like, hang on this is happened before, but last time it was with my brother, love you need to get yourself sorted out, this is still my turf, it doesnt matter how much attention your getting from them, i was born here i grew up here and i introduced you to these people, you need to think about it. AHHH!! i dont know what to do likes because today i was refusing to speack to her and i came out of my graphics exam and she was there and she was all BABE how are you? giving me a hug and its like for fuck sake i cant be dealing with that, just piss off because you cant expect after one teary phonecall that everything is going to magic itself better, these things take time, and tbqh i need time to decide if she deserves to be forgiven becuase like the more i write about it the more pathetic it seems me being so annoyed but then i remember quite how crap i felt when i realised she had left with him and there was absolutly nothing i could do about it, i guess its one of those times when i love someone so much and care about them so much that when they go and do something stupid i worry a hell of a lot and then im angry because its like they dont appear to give a damn about me. and it really doesnt matter what she says atm its all looking like an atempt to make me forgive her, which isnt going to happen for a while, and the thing is that it kills me to ignore her, i love her to bits and dont want to ignore her but i really dont want to talk to her either becuase its like, what the helll am i suppsoed to say, i let her have her piece, i let her explain herslef but her excuses just werent working for me, and maybe your thinking im a total bitch but hey i dont know why im so angry for such a petty thing that doesnt really involve me but i am, so i will be, its the kinda person i am. And its like i have other reasons to be angry i get the feeling that she usually only shows she loves me when she wants to do something or wants something of mine, she had my straigtners for over a week, and no i dont mind but it sucks when you go to use them and rememeber they arent there, and its stupid stuff like on THursday night, we were recording this song that i've written for my dad for christmas and then we went up to talk to my step-mum for a wee bit and i was like, shall we go back down and do some more and she was all nahh im tired lets just leave it and go to bed and then she procceds to be all chatty and shit when we are in bed, and its like if you were tired you wouldnt be sitting talking at me!! AHHHHHHHHHHH! but yeah, frustration out of the way. i'm sorry that you just wasted that amount of time reading that pathetic blog about pathetic stuff, but yeah..
much love
M
p.s going into art tomorrow, gonna spend the day painting and sketching YAY! :)
But yeah at the gig... Well i was working the door because it was the only way my dad was going to let me off the hook for not working in the resturant.... meh and then T and that arrive and i was all sweet, but then i saw T and it was pretty obvious she was pissed, which annoyed me a bit but i was like whatever, yeah and then this guy i know called J and he was really really drunk, Twin are his favourite band and everything but then the bouncer scottie chucked him out and T went with him, i had a bit of an argument with her, telling her not to go and then she left with him in a taxi while i was talking to a different friend of mine, so yeah shes left with this guy, who is very drunk and has a rep of being a slag, shes 14 and that so me, im worried t'hell what if something happens what if she regrets it etc etc so i try and phone her a couple of times and she doesnt answer, not the best sign so yeah i'm pissed off then i get a text on saturday NIGHT asking if i can apologise to my dad for her, and stuff and its like EXCUSE ME! WHAT ABOUT ME BITCH EVER THOUGHT I COULD HAVE BEEN UPSET ABOUT THIS! so yeah she obviously didnt take my thoughts into concideration and then she text me sayin sorry and shit and i was just like, you need to learn to take the consquences for what youve done and i wont believe your sorry until i know you really mean it, i got back a reply that had my text copied out and then a hyphen and i dont believe it, lol im at J house watching Kung Fu Panda... ok who actually does that, they totally disregard someones feeling and go on to talk about what fucking movie they are watching with the guy that they left the night before with... hmm so not a happy millie, Then last night i get a phonecall, it T shes in tears, she cant believe what she did, shes so stupid she shouldve have done it, blah blah blah blah blah tbh because yeah i think she thinks she means it but its like, hang on this is happened before, but last time it was with my brother, love you need to get yourself sorted out, this is still my turf, it doesnt matter how much attention your getting from them, i was born here i grew up here and i introduced you to these people, you need to think about it. AHHH!! i dont know what to do likes because today i was refusing to speack to her and i came out of my graphics exam and she was there and she was all BABE how are you? giving me a hug and its like for fuck sake i cant be dealing with that, just piss off because you cant expect after one teary phonecall that everything is going to magic itself better, these things take time, and tbqh i need time to decide if she deserves to be forgiven becuase like the more i write about it the more pathetic it seems me being so annoyed but then i remember quite how crap i felt when i realised she had left with him and there was absolutly nothing i could do about it, i guess its one of those times when i love someone so much and care about them so much that when they go and do something stupid i worry a hell of a lot and then im angry because its like they dont appear to give a damn about me. and it really doesnt matter what she says atm its all looking like an atempt to make me forgive her, which isnt going to happen for a while, and the thing is that it kills me to ignore her, i love her to bits and dont want to ignore her but i really dont want to talk to her either becuase its like, what the helll am i suppsoed to say, i let her have her piece, i let her explain herslef but her excuses just werent working for me, and maybe your thinking im a total bitch but hey i dont know why im so angry for such a petty thing that doesnt really involve me but i am, so i will be, its the kinda person i am. And its like i have other reasons to be angry i get the feeling that she usually only shows she loves me when she wants to do something or wants something of mine, she had my straigtners for over a week, and no i dont mind but it sucks when you go to use them and rememeber they arent there, and its stupid stuff like on THursday night, we were recording this song that i've written for my dad for christmas and then we went up to talk to my step-mum for a wee bit and i was like, shall we go back down and do some more and she was all nahh im tired lets just leave it and go to bed and then she procceds to be all chatty and shit when we are in bed, and its like if you were tired you wouldnt be sitting talking at me!! AHHHHHHHHHHH! but yeah, frustration out of the way. i'm sorry that you just wasted that amount of time reading that pathetic blog about pathetic stuff, but yeah..
much love
M
p.s going into art tomorrow, gonna spend the day painting and sketching YAY! :)
Tuesday 18 November 2008
i hate maths
yeah, had my maths exam yesterday... totally screwed it up, like BIG time. I was in the exam and some of the questions i didnt understand, let alone know how to do them. and then there were some that i knew i knew how to do them but my mind just went totally blank, it was so frustrating!
but yeah, got french later on... actually in about 45 mins :S i hope i do better in this one!!
Tomorrow should be good fun, im going to visit my dad over the long weekend, and there's a gig on at the music venue he owns. Its a band called twin atlantic from glasgow which should be good fun, and a bunch of my friends from up north are going to be going, so i'll get to see them all which is ace! Im working for a little bit before hand hand though, which sucks a little but i need the money. And its nothing rubbish, im going to be on the door, becuase the way that everything works is that there is one of us (from the venue) and one of them (from the promotion company) hopefully ill be on the door with Dougie because he's sound ..
well i better fly, ive got a french exam to stress over :P
much love
M
xxxx
but yeah, got french later on... actually in about 45 mins :S i hope i do better in this one!!
Tomorrow should be good fun, im going to visit my dad over the long weekend, and there's a gig on at the music venue he owns. Its a band called twin atlantic from glasgow which should be good fun, and a bunch of my friends from up north are going to be going, so i'll get to see them all which is ace! Im working for a little bit before hand hand though, which sucks a little but i need the money. And its nothing rubbish, im going to be on the door, becuase the way that everything works is that there is one of us (from the venue) and one of them (from the promotion company) hopefully ill be on the door with Dougie because he's sound ..
well i better fly, ive got a french exam to stress over :P
much love
M
xxxx
Monday 17 November 2008
17.11.08
i hate exams.
end of.
Yeah had my first prelim today, i was quite freaked out because like, i wasnt nervous at all :/ what does it all mean! well got Maths tomorrow and French day after then a 4 day break then back in with graphics and history on monday and then tuesday nothing and wednesday i have a music practical exam. Thursday i have physics and my theory music exam which is quite scary... then i get firday off and then on monday i have a 5 hour art exam in which im going to be sketching and painting my best friend... i really dont want to mess up!! AHHHHHH!! but ill be fine, im always fine... i should scrape through with all credits, hopefully.... :/
then its french speaking on the day after my art exam.. its all quite stressful!!
ach wells you can only try your best then hope XD
....
still shit scared tho :/
much love
M
xxxx
end of.
Yeah had my first prelim today, i was quite freaked out because like, i wasnt nervous at all :/ what does it all mean! well got Maths tomorrow and French day after then a 4 day break then back in with graphics and history on monday and then tuesday nothing and wednesday i have a music practical exam. Thursday i have physics and my theory music exam which is quite scary... then i get firday off and then on monday i have a 5 hour art exam in which im going to be sketching and painting my best friend... i really dont want to mess up!! AHHHHHH!! but ill be fine, im always fine... i should scrape through with all credits, hopefully.... :/
then its french speaking on the day after my art exam.. its all quite stressful!!
ach wells you can only try your best then hope XD
....
still shit scared tho :/
much love
M
xxxx
Saturday 15 November 2008
side note
yeah i changes the template of my blog, felt like a change... i will probably change it back in a couple of days it is a bit pink...
xx
xx
15.11.08
heya, hows you guys?
im good thanks XD
i went out this evening up at around my dads, it was good fun but really really ( and i mean REALLY) cold! but tres nice to see everyone :)
My friend just broke up with her bf well actually he dumped her, when they were drunk, at an aftershow party.. .i was well pissed off, considering that her bf is my almost brother (hes been like a brother to me ever since i can remember and i really appreciate that) and i cant believe he hurt her like that its like SHEESH MAN cant you see when something amazing is happening to you... grrrrrrrr
anyhoo yeah and another couple that is kinda on hold atm is one of my bessies.. its a pure shame becuase she was so happy on friday and i dont think anyone saw that one coming.. but hopefully they'll get back together after prelims and it will all be good =]
well yeah thats really all atm
i wrote another song today... well thats a lie, i put chords to some lyrics i wrote the other day =]
much love
M
xx
im good thanks XD
i went out this evening up at around my dads, it was good fun but really really ( and i mean REALLY) cold! but tres nice to see everyone :)
My friend just broke up with her bf well actually he dumped her, when they were drunk, at an aftershow party.. .i was well pissed off, considering that her bf is my almost brother (hes been like a brother to me ever since i can remember and i really appreciate that) and i cant believe he hurt her like that its like SHEESH MAN cant you see when something amazing is happening to you... grrrrrrrr
anyhoo yeah and another couple that is kinda on hold atm is one of my bessies.. its a pure shame becuase she was so happy on friday and i dont think anyone saw that one coming.. but hopefully they'll get back together after prelims and it will all be good =]
well yeah thats really all atm
i wrote another song today... well thats a lie, i put chords to some lyrics i wrote the other day =]
much love
M
xx
Friday 14 November 2008
14.11.08 - yeah ive given up on titles...
‘ello ‘ello ‘ello
Hows it going with you lot tonight then?
Well its that time of the week again where im sitting bored out of my mind on the train on my way to visit my dad, with no internet available… grrr.. But yeah
I am going to fail my exams! Its official, well I think I should do ok in the English writing but reading is gonna be a bit iffy laaks, the music listening I should be fine +D as I got a one on my mock but im bricking I about the performing… I’m on first aswell which is scary scary stuff!!!
History should be ok, as I got full marks on my 8-mark bit after having a total freak out after I’d sat it. I really did think I’d screwed it up totally and I know that I seem like one of these people that go “OMG im gonna fail!” and then promptly get full marks, I am to a certain extent but I do have to work pretty hard towards all my exams and that and its quite horrible coming out of an exam/test knowing that you didn’t do the best you could’ve so you know that your not gonna get as good a mark as you could!
But yeah,
French is just a write off :L if I pass it will be a miracle laak, im going first for that as well.. .. Damn my second name being close to the top of the register :L
Graphics im freaking out about because I really want to do well but last time I got like 1 mark under a one which irritated me lots and lots and this time I don’t think I’ll even get that.!
Maths,… don’t even talk to me about that, im so confused about most of the topics its ridiculous!
Physics hmmm if I revise like lots and lots I might pass it but its such a tedious subject to revise for….
Art I just have to practise shed loads before the actual exam which is after all the other prelims but apart from that I should be fine (:
And that’s all my subjects laaks, hmm hopefully I’ll get all credit marks but you can never be sure with this, everyone is like Millie! You’re gonna be fine!! Yoou’re well clever… yeah im clever-ish but there is a hell of a lot of hard work that goes along with that!!
Anyhoo that’s my little rant about failing everything done..
We’re using blogger for the skit trip blog which is sweet XD
That way I’m gonna know all about how to use it and I’ll be able to check mine and that. I’m thinking of making a group blog so I can go on as me instead of going on as the schools user (that im making btw!!) so yeah it should begood cause that way ill be able to write on here as well which is awesome cause I actually really enjoy writing all about everything and you guys have to leave me loads of comments so that I can keep in touch laaks because I don’t think ill have that much credit to text you both. : (
Anyway
Much Love
M
xxxx
Hows it going with you lot tonight then?
Well its that time of the week again where im sitting bored out of my mind on the train on my way to visit my dad, with no internet available… grrr.. But yeah
I am going to fail my exams! Its official, well I think I should do ok in the English writing but reading is gonna be a bit iffy laaks, the music listening I should be fine +D as I got a one on my mock but im bricking I about the performing… I’m on first aswell which is scary scary stuff!!!
History should be ok, as I got full marks on my 8-mark bit after having a total freak out after I’d sat it. I really did think I’d screwed it up totally and I know that I seem like one of these people that go “OMG im gonna fail!” and then promptly get full marks, I am to a certain extent but I do have to work pretty hard towards all my exams and that and its quite horrible coming out of an exam/test knowing that you didn’t do the best you could’ve so you know that your not gonna get as good a mark as you could!
But yeah,
French is just a write off :L if I pass it will be a miracle laak, im going first for that as well.. .. Damn my second name being close to the top of the register :L
Graphics im freaking out about because I really want to do well but last time I got like 1 mark under a one which irritated me lots and lots and this time I don’t think I’ll even get that.!
Maths,… don’t even talk to me about that, im so confused about most of the topics its ridiculous!
Physics hmmm if I revise like lots and lots I might pass it but its such a tedious subject to revise for….
Art I just have to practise shed loads before the actual exam which is after all the other prelims but apart from that I should be fine (:
And that’s all my subjects laaks, hmm hopefully I’ll get all credit marks but you can never be sure with this, everyone is like Millie! You’re gonna be fine!! Yoou’re well clever… yeah im clever-ish but there is a hell of a lot of hard work that goes along with that!!
Anyhoo that’s my little rant about failing everything done..
We’re using blogger for the skit trip blog which is sweet XD
That way I’m gonna know all about how to use it and I’ll be able to check mine and that. I’m thinking of making a group blog so I can go on as me instead of going on as the schools user (that im making btw!!) so yeah it should begood cause that way ill be able to write on here as well which is awesome cause I actually really enjoy writing all about everything and you guys have to leave me loads of comments so that I can keep in touch laaks because I don’t think ill have that much credit to text you both. : (
Anyway
Much Love
M
xxxx
ayyee
ey up.
well i just worked out that the school computers don't block blogger so that means that i can blog in the morning after swimming.
I did 50 lengths again this morning. So that now takes me up to a total of 150 this week. which is awesome. On monday i did 50 in a 30-20 split (breast stroke - front crawl) and both wednesday and today (friday) i did 50 with a 50:50 split of breaststroke and front crawl, I find the best way to do it is if you do 20 lengths of front crawl as soon as you get in the pool, then do a one length front crawl, one length breaststroke kinda thing for 10 lengths then do 20 lengths of breast stroke... seems to work for me. That way i can get 50 lengths done in 1/2 an hour before school which is sweet :)
but yeah thats really it i dont have anything very interesting to say this morning do i? :L:L
ach wells
with love
M
xxx
well i just worked out that the school computers don't block blogger so that means that i can blog in the morning after swimming.
I did 50 lengths again this morning. So that now takes me up to a total of 150 this week. which is awesome. On monday i did 50 in a 30-20 split (breast stroke - front crawl) and both wednesday and today (friday) i did 50 with a 50:50 split of breaststroke and front crawl, I find the best way to do it is if you do 20 lengths of front crawl as soon as you get in the pool, then do a one length front crawl, one length breaststroke kinda thing for 10 lengths then do 20 lengths of breast stroke... seems to work for me. That way i can get 50 lengths done in 1/2 an hour before school which is sweet :)
but yeah thats really it i dont have anything very interesting to say this morning do i? :L:L
ach wells
with love
M
xxx
Tuesday 11 November 2008
oi oi ;)
heya
how are you all?
sorry i haven't written in a while i havent really had thatmuch to talk about, strange as it seems :L
well yeah secret santa, i think i know what im doing about it but im not really that sure, pippa doesnt know what she wants which doesnt help, but i have a couple of thoughts : )
I have a little problem with T's pressie (yeah i didnt get her for SS but shes been an amazing mate this year so i want to make her something) and yeah i know what i WANT to do, its the lagistics of getting it done that is the problem.. it involves stealing some stuff from her you see... i shall say no more as i have a feeling she reads my blog :L:L
but yeah, worried about burger again. I know that its bad, like really bad but i think she should try and get some help. Guidence is there to help you. They arent out to get you and they helped me for a while, strange, i know the girl who cant put across her emotions and has to look after one else, going to guidence... sounds a bit crazy dont it but hey thats the way life goes, im through that now... well im thinking of going to see them but i know that the people that i would want to talk to them about wouldnt want me to, so i wont :)
Yeah now a new figure i havent spoken about. yeah im worried about her laaks but yeah i shall just keep those worries locked away for the moment..
Good News tho!!
on ski trip Mr B is thinking of doing a blog so he asked for volenteers to like set it up and run it and stuff.. i obviously put my name down as i blog quite regularly (not as regularly as i would if i could but hey..) and i was like "sir what hosting site are you thinking of using?" and he was all "you appear to know a lot more about this than i do so would you be able to run the project?" CHUFFED?! i am :)
so yeah i have to go and see him so that i can get all the details of what he wants so i can see if blogger will fit the bill or if i will need to go and look at other blogging sites, or even vlogging, that would be rather amusing :L
but yeah, if im doing the blogging thing while im in france that means that i can keep up to date on here and everything which is awesome :) and that means i can talk to certain people *cough* T and Burger *cough* :L:L
well thats about it for this evening, i shall probably post something else later
Love
M
xxx
how are you all?
sorry i haven't written in a while i havent really had thatmuch to talk about, strange as it seems :L
well yeah secret santa, i think i know what im doing about it but im not really that sure, pippa doesnt know what she wants which doesnt help, but i have a couple of thoughts : )
I have a little problem with T's pressie (yeah i didnt get her for SS but shes been an amazing mate this year so i want to make her something) and yeah i know what i WANT to do, its the lagistics of getting it done that is the problem.. it involves stealing some stuff from her you see... i shall say no more as i have a feeling she reads my blog :L:L
but yeah, worried about burger again. I know that its bad, like really bad but i think she should try and get some help. Guidence is there to help you. They arent out to get you and they helped me for a while, strange, i know the girl who cant put across her emotions and has to look after one else, going to guidence... sounds a bit crazy dont it but hey thats the way life goes, im through that now... well im thinking of going to see them but i know that the people that i would want to talk to them about wouldnt want me to, so i wont :)
Yeah now a new figure i havent spoken about. yeah im worried about her laaks but yeah i shall just keep those worries locked away for the moment..
Good News tho!!
on ski trip Mr B is thinking of doing a blog so he asked for volenteers to like set it up and run it and stuff.. i obviously put my name down as i blog quite regularly (not as regularly as i would if i could but hey..) and i was like "sir what hosting site are you thinking of using?" and he was all "you appear to know a lot more about this than i do so would you be able to run the project?" CHUFFED?! i am :)
so yeah i have to go and see him so that i can get all the details of what he wants so i can see if blogger will fit the bill or if i will need to go and look at other blogging sites, or even vlogging, that would be rather amusing :L
but yeah, if im doing the blogging thing while im in france that means that i can keep up to date on here and everything which is awesome :) and that means i can talk to certain people *cough* T and Burger *cough* :L:L
well thats about it for this evening, i shall probably post something else later
Love
M
xxx
Monday 10 November 2008
just a few things...
Why is it that everyone needs to have some kind of point to prove..
I never understand that.
Its like why, if you’re happy bother looking for a point to prove.. It annoys me when people just prove a point for the sake of it.
Grrr
I got my Christmas dance dress!! Well chuffed its so pretty, its red and black and I love it~!
Can’t wait for the dance now….. J
You know when you feel totally alone, like you have no one that you can speak to or that you can trust.
It sucks big time doesn’t it, but you need to take a deep breath and think about it, maybe you want to change everything about yourself, but maybe someone, somewhere loves you for who you really are, and doesn’t care how shit you’re feeling or how much crap you’re getting from you “friends” and your “family” an if only you wanted to talk they would be there. Maybe they caused a gap between you that they only wished they could fix, so that you would trust them enough to let them know what is up and why you feel so alone. Maybe you could let them in… I miss you. < / 3
Much love
M
xxxxx
I never understand that.
Its like why, if you’re happy bother looking for a point to prove.. It annoys me when people just prove a point for the sake of it.
Grrr
I got my Christmas dance dress!! Well chuffed its so pretty, its red and black and I love it~!
Can’t wait for the dance now….. J
You know when you feel totally alone, like you have no one that you can speak to or that you can trust.
It sucks big time doesn’t it, but you need to take a deep breath and think about it, maybe you want to change everything about yourself, but maybe someone, somewhere loves you for who you really are, and doesn’t care how shit you’re feeling or how much crap you’re getting from you “friends” and your “family” an if only you wanted to talk they would be there. Maybe they caused a gap between you that they only wished they could fix, so that you would trust them enough to let them know what is up and why you feel so alone. Maybe you could let them in… I miss you. < / 3
Much love
M
xxxxx
Friday 7 November 2008
yeah well i gues i should tell you anyway.....
this is from this other blog i was gonna have but then decided that i wouldnt bother,,, i called it "if i said it outloud would it hurt them,.. because it was for where i would write things that would hurt if i wrotethem here because i know that some people i know really well read this blog and i dont have a problem with that or anything but there are somethings that i wouldnt want to tell you because it would upset you but ive decided that i can deal with you reading this and im going to [once ive posted this] delete my other blog because it serves no purpose.Tuesday, 14 October 2008
meh
ok this is just a continuation of my blog talkingsolvesproblems.blogspot.com but i can't write what i'm about to write on their because a certain set of people will read it and i know that is kinda the point but i want to have somewhere, where no one will read and i can just rant...
anyhoo tonight- me=pissed off, well not pissed off more jealous and annoyed but yeah.
T is totally falling for PM and its like yeah thats nice babe but im feeling pish at the moment because im not over my ex and no one looks twice at me. AND you're more popular in somewhere I used ot live and AHHHHH!! its just really annoying. yeah i was using her phone to talk to this guy i know who is really good at sorting things out in my head and all but then she went and took her phone when she went upstairs and i KNOW she will be reading through all the texts so shes gonna find out everything i think anyway but its like MEH! and then she wants to look through my sketchbook and i really dont want her to i was like not until its finsihed but the thing is it has all my thoughts in it when im annoyed or angry or upset i sit down and i draw, so its like hmmm what am i gonna do :( :(
well i gotta fly i need my sleep
Millie loves you
xxxx
meh
ok this is just a continuation of my blog talkingsolvesproblems.blogspot.com but i can't write what i'm about to write on their because a certain set of people will read it and i know that is kinda the point but i want to have somewhere, where no one will read and i can just rant...
anyhoo tonight- me=pissed off, well not pissed off more jealous and annoyed but yeah.
T is totally falling for PM and its like yeah thats nice babe but im feeling pish at the moment because im not over my ex and no one looks twice at me. AND you're more popular in somewhere I used ot live and AHHHHH!! its just really annoying. yeah i was using her phone to talk to this guy i know who is really good at sorting things out in my head and all but then she went and took her phone when she went upstairs and i KNOW she will be reading through all the texts so shes gonna find out everything i think anyway but its like MEH! and then she wants to look through my sketchbook and i really dont want her to i was like not until its finsihed but the thing is it has all my thoughts in it when im annoyed or angry or upset i sit down and i draw, so its like hmmm what am i gonna do :( :(
well i gotta fly i need my sleep
Millie loves you
xxxx
Monday 3 November 2008
A reply to "random thoughts on love"
well i thought i would answer your question.
"All these things, so crappy. They happen to a lot of people, but for some reason we keep wanting love. What is that all about? We are crushed, shattered, bandaged, and mended. And we want more! It's absurd. No, it's human nature. We want love. We need love; most of us. "
why do we want love. because you want
to wake up in the morning and know someones thinking about you and smile
feel the butterflies in your stomach when see some one
have secret little looks that only the two of you know what they mean
to feel that close to someone
just that feeling you get, i dont know how to explain it
have you ever been in love?
i have, well i thought i was.
being in love means that the verysmell of that someone makes you feel dizzy.
when you look at them you can help but smile.
that you can talk to them about anything and everything and it doesnt matter as long as your talking.
thats what i think love is what do you think?
love
M
xx
"All these things, so crappy. They happen to a lot of people, but for some reason we keep wanting love. What is that all about? We are crushed, shattered, bandaged, and mended. And we want more! It's absurd. No, it's human nature. We want love. We need love; most of us. "
why do we want love. because you want
to wake up in the morning and know someones thinking about you and smile
feel the butterflies in your stomach when see some one
have secret little looks that only the two of you know what they mean
to feel that close to someone
just that feeling you get, i dont know how to explain it
have you ever been in love?
i have, well i thought i was.
being in love means that the verysmell of that someone makes you feel dizzy.
when you look at them you can help but smile.
that you can talk to them about anything and everything and it doesnt matter as long as your talking.
thats what i think love is what do you think?
love
M
xx
well well well
well todays been quite how shall i put it... stressful.
i hate relationships. yet i want one so bad.
I hate them because
they cause trouble
no one is ever happy
some one is always getting hurt
soemthing always have to give
once you get over those problems well... your single really.
i would go into it but i think i might wait a few hours til i cant sleep and then do it.
its ridiculous now becuase its like a rountine... i cant sleep
i write blogs
i go on msn
i try and sleep
i wake up
and im late.
it sucks
:(
meh
xxx
i hate relationships. yet i want one so bad.
I hate them because
they cause trouble
no one is ever happy
some one is always getting hurt
soemthing always have to give
once you get over those problems well... your single really.
i would go into it but i think i might wait a few hours til i cant sleep and then do it.
its ridiculous now becuase its like a rountine... i cant sleep
i write blogs
i go on msn
i try and sleep
i wake up
and im late.
it sucks
:(
meh
xxx
Sunday 2 November 2008
31st october... happy halloween
Hello there, I’m writing another one of those “on the train” blogs. Get really quite bored when im on the train so it’s a good way to pass the time. What can I say. I’m travelling across the country and I’m missing what could be a really good party… but what can you do, parents come first… right?
A sweetener on the fact that I’m leaving all my friends to go visit my dad, is that I am getting to go out tomorrow night and see a bunch of people that I haven’t seen for a couple of weeks which is awesome…
Halloween today. I’m doing nothing. I don’t really see the point. I was at school all day and now I’m on the train and then when I get to dads it in the middle of nowhere and yes my younger sister is going out trick or treating but I really cannot be bothered to go around the pitiful number of houses that are around my dads, its pretty much a waste of time getting dressed up. But yeah the party im missing tonight is a Halloween party and it sounds like its going to be a pretty good one as well. Well apart from the fact that the girlie that is having it’s parents don’t know she’s having it so everyone may have to disappear at a moments notice, which should be quite funny. Obv its fancy dress and I know what a couple of my mates are going as.. One of the guys is going as a nurse, pippa’s going as a naughty school girl, T is going as a kitten, MM is going as a fireman but im not supposed to know that as it’s a surprise for everyone at the party but pippa told me =] hes got all the proper kit as well which should be awesome J
But yeah tomorrow night im going out to bonfire night up at my dads and I’m not too sure whats gonna happen. Everyone says that its amazing fun but last time I went it seemed incredibly boring but I guess that’s because I wasn’t with all my mates and completely wasted…
Not that im gonna get wasted tomorrow night, because im staying with my dad there is no point in trying anything. If I come home sober I’d be fine but the thing with that is that I have a very short period of time that I get to see everyone. And in that time everyone is drinking a hell of a lot. I can get away with drinking a little because I can hold my drink a hell of a lot better than T but I worked out that when I drink I really just get a sore head.. Not like a hangover but while im drinking I get a sore head, I guess its from the dehydration or whatever but meh… but I don’t really have the desire to get completely wasted like a load of my friends its like love you really don’t need to get wasted to have a good time … but they never listen and some of them (I get quite pissed off when they do this) go the entire day with hardly any food so that they get wasted really quickly and that and I really don’t think that its really necessary cause its like, yeah babe you might be drinking at whatever ,,, and I really don’t have a problem with that or whatever but if your gonna purposefully get yourself para then your just really stupid laak.
Well I’ve pretty much ran outta things to say for the moment and the train has JUST left the station… grrrr… oh well what can you do laak ..
love
M
A sweetener on the fact that I’m leaving all my friends to go visit my dad, is that I am getting to go out tomorrow night and see a bunch of people that I haven’t seen for a couple of weeks which is awesome…
Halloween today. I’m doing nothing. I don’t really see the point. I was at school all day and now I’m on the train and then when I get to dads it in the middle of nowhere and yes my younger sister is going out trick or treating but I really cannot be bothered to go around the pitiful number of houses that are around my dads, its pretty much a waste of time getting dressed up. But yeah the party im missing tonight is a Halloween party and it sounds like its going to be a pretty good one as well. Well apart from the fact that the girlie that is having it’s parents don’t know she’s having it so everyone may have to disappear at a moments notice, which should be quite funny. Obv its fancy dress and I know what a couple of my mates are going as.. One of the guys is going as a nurse, pippa’s going as a naughty school girl, T is going as a kitten, MM is going as a fireman but im not supposed to know that as it’s a surprise for everyone at the party but pippa told me =] hes got all the proper kit as well which should be awesome J
But yeah tomorrow night im going out to bonfire night up at my dads and I’m not too sure whats gonna happen. Everyone says that its amazing fun but last time I went it seemed incredibly boring but I guess that’s because I wasn’t with all my mates and completely wasted…
Not that im gonna get wasted tomorrow night, because im staying with my dad there is no point in trying anything. If I come home sober I’d be fine but the thing with that is that I have a very short period of time that I get to see everyone. And in that time everyone is drinking a hell of a lot. I can get away with drinking a little because I can hold my drink a hell of a lot better than T but I worked out that when I drink I really just get a sore head.. Not like a hangover but while im drinking I get a sore head, I guess its from the dehydration or whatever but meh… but I don’t really have the desire to get completely wasted like a load of my friends its like love you really don’t need to get wasted to have a good time … but they never listen and some of them (I get quite pissed off when they do this) go the entire day with hardly any food so that they get wasted really quickly and that and I really don’t think that its really necessary cause its like, yeah babe you might be drinking at whatever ,,, and I really don’t have a problem with that or whatever but if your gonna purposefully get yourself para then your just really stupid laak.
Well I’ve pretty much ran outta things to say for the moment and the train has JUST left the station… grrrr… oh well what can you do laak ..
love
M
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